Googly Eyes

Yep. Both girls got glasses this summer. Craziness. I'm still not convinced it's not a sham. They had eye doctor appointments in the same week. First Quinny - yep, glasses it is. Then a couple of days later, Piper - yep, glasses! At first my vanity took over and I started feeling sorry that I wouldn't get to see those 4 beautiful eyes without seeing my own reflection looking back at me. Then I pep-talked myself into being ok with it. I mean, after all - of all the medical "issues" children can and do have? Really? I'm going to be upset about them wearing glasses? I guess I can get over it....

OK, but how do I get them over it? THAT is the question. Piper got hers first on a Thursday evening. I got home from work and out walked this sweet little librarian looking nymph. Shyly smiling at me through her new specs, awaiting my response. OH! I know it sounds cheesy, but my heart swelled and I was SO proud of my little "big girl". The next day was our nephews' adoption party. When Piper and her daddy walked up to her cousin, the first thing he said was: "Wow! I love your glasses!". Ok! Off to a good start! As the party went on, Piper became less and less excited about wearing her glasses. They kept slipping down her nose. They kept getting dirty. They got caught in her hair. And the other kids kept asking "Why are you wearing glasses?" To which she had no answer....Mom stepped in and said, "So she can see better!"

"Why, are her eyes bad?". Bad? Bad?! NO! Nothing on MY child is BAD! "BAD" is such a bad word! Not bad! Not bad! I fumbled, stumbled and flubbed. Most of all I did not want Piper to feel like she was inferior to anyone JUST because she had glasses! I think I just said something lame like "NO, not bad, just....not good...." Um. Yes. That's MUCH better mom. (Well I guess that might keep Piper from asking me to stand up for her in the future!)

It was the first time I've ever had a child in a situation where teasing became a real possibility. I could just hear the taunts "4-eyes, 4 eyes! Nah nah na na nah nah!". It made me cringe. It made me sad. It made me realize - I need to get over it. It's not about me. It's not about my kids being inferior. Yes, they are going to be different than kids without glasses. So? Don't I tell my kids that different is ok? Why is it ok for other people, but not my kids? Can't different be really special? And don't I HOPE that they CHOOSE to be different sometimes?

I know, I know. Glasses are really no big deal. But when it's your kids - it's different.

I have to say I am so proud of how they have both taken their glasses in stride. Piper wears them now without complaint and loves noticing others who wear glasses: the girl in her dance class, Grandma, Grandpa, the babysitter, and now even her cousin who thought her glasses were so cool! Quinny took to hers like a natural. Piper had had her glasses for about 5 days before she got hers- which definitely helped. And, she can SEE. You should have seen her looking around the house her first day with glasses. Like she had never seen it before. She does take them off occasionally to get my attention, but I didn't have to - as my best friend suggested - put the cardboard inserts of paper towel rolls over her elbows to keep her glasses on. (Take a minute for that visual - I guarantee a giggle.)

So, as usually happens, my girls have taught me a valuable lesson. As I look at my reflection in their glasses I gain insight into my insecurities as a mom, my imperfections and the things that make me different. And I see warm loving black-coffee brown and deep ocean blue smiling back at me, not getting what I was so wound up about.